To new beginnings..

So we've all experienced those days where we feel unloved, unwanted and misunderstood.. And spent hours brooding over the 'pain' inflicted on us (real or imagined).. And perhaps spent time thinking how can people be so insensitive or indifferent.. How can my being hurt not bother my closest 'friends'? Are they so uncaring.. Or am I so insignificant in their lives? Well, the truth is they've always been insensitive/uncaring/indifferent.. But I chose to see beyond that and believe that these people are wonderful people who will never hurt me.. That's precisely why they say 'expectations hurt'.. You put someone on a pedestal.. Give yourself fully to them.. Open up to them, let them in, trust them, only to have your trust broken and your relationship reduced to ruins.. What ruins it is the picture we have in our minds of how its 'Supposed' to be.. People are 'supposed' to be kind and caring.. Friends are 'supposed' to be there for you through thick and thin.. They are 'supposed' to wipe your tears and not be the cause for them.. But what I'm realising over the years is that people are human and flawed.. And they are going to let you down.. The closer the relationship, the harder the blows.. And that people are not going to feel towards me the way I feel towards them..so I can go out of my way to ensure someone's feelings are not hurt but I have to be prepared for the fact that no one really cares about my feelings.. To paraphrase a dialogue from one of my favourite shows OINTB which goes like 'You can't spend your whole life holding the door open for people and then get mad when they don't thank you.. No one asked you to hold the door open ".. So it's a choice.. You can either hold the door open for people and be happy even though no one says' Thank-You'.. Or you can shut the door.. I guess it's time for me to shut the door and walk towards a new beginning..