Thoughts on death and dying..

So for all those people mourning the death of Sushant Singh Rajput, here are some statistics for you.. Between January and March 2019, 610 farmers committed suicide in India.. At the time this also made news headlines but never trended on Social Media.. Also I never saw these many posts/tweets praying for the souls of those farmers so that they rest in peace.. I'd like to ask "Why wasn't same concern shown then?"..

See I don't want to get preachy about the whole issue because I know I'm not perfect.. But it does make me want to laugh out aloud when I read comments like "Lets boycott Bollywood", Let's boycott XYZ films. and not watch films of actors namely ABC, EFG and so on.. Like really?? You're going to boycott "their" films?? Hypocritic much? You're seriously going to boycott movies produced by a certain individual because you feel he/she abetted the suicide of the person in the news lately? Well I know I wont.. the reason being, I pay a hefty subscription for Netflix and other OTT platforms.. and as a consumer I would like to have my money's worth.. So in the present scenario if a particular film maker decides to release a film on an OTT platform I will definitely watch it.. That doesn't mean I condone what happened..

It's so easy to pass judgnement on someone else and say that they are responsible for whatever happened.. So yes.. Bollywood is infamous for it's evils like "The casting couch" or "Nepotism", Or favouritism or "camps" and not allowing the "outsiders" into the film fraternity.. But that doesnt seem to stop the lakhs of show biz aspirants who come to Mumbai every year, with stars in their eyes, and hopes in their heart and dreams of making it big in this tinsel town called "Bollywood".. But hardly a handful of these aspirants ever get an opportunity or a break.. They just spend the rest of their lives doing odd jobs while waiting for that big break.. But Sushant Singh Rajput got this opportunity.. He made a name for himself.. He had achieved 'stardom', fame, money, fans.. The world was his oyster.. But despite having all this he still felt alone and left out..

Which makes me wonder.. What is the definition of success? If what Sushant had is not 'success' then what else is.. There are so many theories about the cause of his suicide.. That he was shunned from Bollywood.. Nobody was willing to sign him up for films.. He wasn't invited to their parties.. All this drove him to commit suicide.. Was it worth it? Is it worth giving up your life for someone else? I dont think so.. If he was feeling depressed he shouldve sought for professional help.. There is no other way around dealing with depression.. A friend/a lover cannot make that depression go away.. it is unfair to pin the blame of someone's suicide on other people around.. Sushant Singh Rajput had the resources to seek professional help.. But he chose not to.. for reasons best known to him..

Agreed, Bollywood promotes people it considers it's 'own'.. And so while the star kids have it easy, other talented 'outsiders' have to jump through several hoops if they want to succeed or rather 'survive' in the industry..But i'm sure you'll agree with me when I say that the politics/clicks/groupism/favouritsm are a part of any industry.. all of us at some point have experienced these issues at our workplace.. But we have found ways to deal with it.. Right from ignoring the people around, just shutting out those unpleasant situations and in extreme cases - quitting the job..

It's only when a suicide happens, especially when a famous personality is involved, we take to social media to express our sorrow and regret at the life that was cut short intentionally.. News channels and people in general just discuss about the reason for the suicide.. Never have I seen talk shows or debate shows speak about what are the possible ways to handle depressions/suicidal tendencies.. How to identify signs of depression? what kind of support can be given to someone suffering from depression..

It's time to change the narrative here..

Now is not the time to Boycott Bollywood..

Now is the time to be there for your family and loved ones..

Now is the time to teach your child that marks/grades/ranks are not everything..

Now is the time to tell your son that its okay if he wants to play with dolls.. It is the time to tell him that there is no shame in crying if he's hurt..

Now is the time to tell your daughter that you would be proud of her even if she decided she didnt want to be a doctor/engineer but chose a 'simple' profession of a Teacher..

Now is the time to tell your child that you are there for him/her always and you will always love them unconditionally..

Now is the time to realise and accept that you are talented, kind, intelligent and you deserve all the love that there is in the world..

Now is the time to be confident of yourself and your abilites.. Confidence here doesn't mean that "They will like me".. Confidence means "I don't care even they don't like me"

Now is the time to respect yourself and love yourself unconditionally, love your strenghts as well as your flaws.. Because if you can't love yourself, you can't expect someone else to love you..

Now is that time to strive to be self sufficient (financially, mentally, emotionally)..

Now is the time to be "Aatmanirbhar".. ;-)